Friday, August 18, 2006

"This is New York"

I'm so sick of people telling me "this is new York" like I don't already fucking know.
A few examples:

Me: Yeah, I want to get a two bedroom place for around 1400 that's close to the city and my job.
Friend: This is New York bro. That's not going to happen.
--What the fuck?? I know where the fuck I am and it doesn't mean I need to be miserable in the ass end of Brooklyn with a 3 hour commute to work. I'm from the Midwest but it doesn't mean I'm a bumpkin who cant work "the interweb" to find a cheap place close to the city, which I already did.

Me: That guy looks like Andrew WK!
Stupid bitch girl: Andrew WK is like so five years ago. This is New York, we don't talk about Andrew WK. I don't know how you do it in Minnesota.
--What a cunt, location doesn't change the fact that this fuck looked like Andrew WK's dipshit cousin. I was ready to hit her in her hipster face.

Friend: Go hit on that girl, this is New York bro, you gotta be
aggressive.
--You have to be aggressive fucking everywhere. What am I supposed to do different because this is New York?? Stab her and take her wallet?

Me: Yeah when I was young I got really into Wrecx N Effect (haha yeah, I know)
Job Interviewer: Oh, you got that music all the way out there in Minnesota?? Wow.
--No, I only got to hear polka band renditions of "rumpshaker" while I fucked my cousins.

WOW I am angry. Haha, that's the hangover talking. I feel better now that I vented. Gnarls Barkley was awesome. My big party is tonight, see you there.

In more "typical" Name Drop Acid (i.e., minor brushes with celebrity) fashion, I just found out I have to work the door at the MTV VMA afterparty in two weeks. I will keep you posted on this madness.