24 Hour Hardee's Evil

I met Tony Wilson on Friday.

--If you don't know who Tony Wilson is, he singlehandedly started the UK rave movement with his independent label Factory Records, signing Joy Division (Love will tear us apart) who became New Order (Blue Monday [NOT Orgy]), and the Happy Mondays (Whose lead singer's fat head is in Noodle's closet in the Gorillaz video for "Dare"), among others.

He came in and introduced himself as "Mr. Wilson". This man is a legend, especially to me. Initially, didn't know it was him, so I hung out with him while he waited for his meeting with another legend, who is a different story altogether. We hung out and bitched about the incompetent security in our building. You could tell his reputation for being an uncompromising prick with a grim sense of humor is warranted. You could also tell he was extremely cool.

Eventually, legend #2's assistant came out to get him, at this point Mr. Wilson said his first name. This is when the wheels came off for me. When I put 2 and 2 together, I made this stupid noise that was somewhere between a gasp and the sound boxers make when they get hit. Somewhere in this noise I incorporated a, "YOUR Tony WILSON???!!" making me look like a huge moron, they both heard me, but not quite well enough to respond. As they walked past they both gave me a look like I had just whipped my dick out. The kind of look that was meant to say, "put it away kid, you're embarrassing yourself."